Tuesday, September 15, 2009

Look what Abby's doing!

It has been awhile since our last post. Abby is 11 weeks old now! She is growing so fast and doing new things every day! Like today I walked in her room to get her and this is what I found!


That is my baby sucking her thumb! YIKES, take it away. Let see since our last post we made dinner at the Ronald McDonald house in Ann Arbor with other CDH families and it was a success! Thank you to everyone who helped out! While we were there we found Faith's name on a Gold Leaf on a tree in the RMH! It is given when donations reach $500 in a child's name! So thank you to all who donated in her memory. We had no idea!



Abby went swimming for the first time over Labor Day weekend. The pool was 81 but she didn't care for it! We also started putting her in a jumparoo and she loves it! On Labor Day I think it was, we went to Holland to pick up a cradle swing and we visited the lake. Abby fell asleep.

Well we will try and keep you all updated more frequently! We have a blood drive coming up on October 5th, 3pm-7pm at Cornerstone United Methodist Church, Caledonia, MI.

Love,

Amy, Steve, Faith, and Abby






Monday, September 7, 2009

Message for angel mommies...

This waas the message at our church a few weeks ago...please read or listen online http://cornerstonemi.org/pages/page.asp?page_id=68901

Don’t Lie To Me
“Why God?”
August 30, 2009
Brad Kalajainen/Ken Nash

Pain and suffering. What are we to do with it? When that unexpected phone call comes and you hear the voice on other end of line say, “The other guy ran a red light. I’m sorry.” Or “Dad was taken to hospital…it doesn’t look good.” “Mom just had a stroke. You had better get down here.” “The doctor says the tests were more serious than once thought.”

You know that in that moment, life will never be the same. When your life long friend and supervisor says out of the blue, “I’m so sorry, but we are phasing you out. Things just haven’t turned out as we had hoped. You’ll land on your feet. But not here.” Or after 15 years of marriage you hear, “It’s time you know I’m having an affair. I want out.” Or Jim was in an accident at work, you will raising your kids alone. What do you do with another night of cramping, as you realize you are miscarrying your baby…again? How do even make sense of words like, Cancer… terminal… hospice… funeral preparation….
Last week we began this series called “Don’t lie to me.” We began by exposing the most common strategy used by the devil—the strategy of “Distortion!” We discovered that he will give you just enough truth in his whispering to get you to let your guard down. For these next 3 weeks we will be looking at the three most opportune times for him to use his art of distortion. Today we will be looking at small lies and twists occur during those times of crisis or tragedy. For some, their faith is just so fragile that it is easy for them to just say, “I’m done! There is no God! I’m sick of trying to find him!” Others just start believing that God is doing the best he can. Others come to believe the lie that God has left us to fend for ourselves as they latch on to the deist worldview. They say things like, God is clearly too big to care for my tiny world on this speck of dust in the universe that we call earth. These responses obviously won’t heal the pain, the truth is that they actually cause more pain as you cling to a distorted view of God in your anger! But they all have one thing in common…they all blame God.
The irony of pain and suffering is that it is truly the shortest path to God. Many of you have heard the quote by CS Lewis, “God whispers in our pleasures, speaks in our conscience but shouts in our pain.” Atheist or not, we can’t help but to run to God in these moments. Why is that? Because we need to know the answer to the why! Why did mom die so young? Why would God allow SIDS? Why did that disease happen?
The question looms. Why God? There has got to be a reason for my pain. What is the greater good? If we can find a reason, then we can endure, can’t we, but when it doesn’t make sense, our confidence in God wanes. I mean just think of the kinds of pain people endure when they have an end goal in mind. Just take tattooing for example. (Show pictures of tattooed people). How could someone be poked with needles on every pore of their body if not for having an ultimate reason? If captured behind enemy lines, that would be called torture, but because it is body art, they can endure! Or think of dental work or elective surgeries. People can endure massive amounts of pain just by having an end goal in mind. They say, “This pain makes sense because it will accomplish something.”
With that in mind, we really shouldn’t be surprised when tragedy strikes that our first response is to say, “I’ve got to make sense of this!” So we look to the only one who can possibly give an answer. God, why did this happen? If you are the all knowing, all powerful, all loving creator, then what in the world could you possibly be up to? And when we don’t hear a clear answer or an answer we are satisfied with, we start to wonder, “Is this my fault?” What if I would have called him? What if I would have left the house 10 seconds later? What if I had done a background check on that person? The more you think about it, the more you are consumed with guilt or rage or tears of emotion that confuse and paralyze you.
You know what? It’s very natural to get overwhelmed and confused when you are suffering. Think about this. Even Jesus lost perspective on the cross when he cried out, “WHY? Why have you abandoned me God?” Even Jesus lost context! It is amazing the disorientation that happens while in pain. I recently ran in a 200 mile relay race from Madison Wisconsin to Chicago, Illinois with 5 other guys. It took us 27 ½ hours of constant movement. We all ran an average of 33 miles during 6 legs each. I knew the goal, but listen to my journal entry after the 3rd leg. To give you context, Tom Dean spear-headed this idea and invited us to run in this God-forsaken race. Listen to my words, “Why did you have cross paths with Tom Dean, Lord...” (get the rest of the entry from Joe Fifer). Don’t worry, 4 weeks later, I forgave him.
When in pain, it is so easy to lose perspective and for confusion and doubts to set in. We are so susceptible in those times for the enemy to distort our thinking and thus get us blaming the very God who wants to rescue us. So what we do is try to fit the small pieces together by saying things like, “Maybe dad died so young so that the nurse could see our faith and we could witness to her.” Or, “maybe I lost my child so that I could help others someday.” Or “maybe that drunk driver crossed that center line so that I could get to show him unconditional love and forgiveness.” But as much as we try to fit the pieces together, those just are not the answer.
Listen. Death and disease is not God’s plan! Let me explain this further. Today I want to connect “the 3 big dots” from Scripture. We’ll be looking at Romans 8. What we are about to study is going to give you major perspective. We aren’t going to try to fit the little pieces together, because frankly, sometimes we just can’t. But there are 3 big dots that bring pain and suffering into focus. One promise I can make right up front is that by knowing the answer to why tragedy happens and how God works in all of it won’t make the pain go away. The answer isn’t emotionally gratifying. But it will give you context. Just like the tattooed person knew why he was going through the pain, but it didn’t stop the needles from hurting him. However, the context and big perspective helped him to get through the pain. You also need to know up front that the answer we are going to find is directed to Christians. So if you are not yet a believer, just listen in and keep adding your discoveries to your search for truth. And hopefully this will give you the courage to take that step toward Jesus.
Okay. The 3 big dots that will connect our quest for answers to the problem of pain and suffering are: 1) In the beginning 2) In the mean time 3) In the end.
There you have it. All better now? Questions answered? Well, what does it mean? Let’s look at Scripture to help unpack it. Verse 20 of Romans 8. “For the creation was subjected to frustration, not by its own choice, but by the will of the one who subjected it, in hope that the creation itself will be liberated from its bondage to decay and brought into the glorious freedom of the children of God. We know that the whole creation has been groaning as in the pains of childbirth right up to the present time.” Romans 8: 20-22
For the creation has been frustrated from the beginning! All of creation is groaning to this very day because it has been tainted by sin. Sin has separated us from oneness with God and fullness of who we were created to be. Sin has reigned ever since. Do you know why your back aches? Because you are in bondage to decay. Why is there pain? Because we are deteriorating. Everything has been clouded under this darkness. As I said, pain and suffering is not God’s plan. It is consequence.
So with that in mind, when you scream out, “God what did I do to deserve this?” The Biblical answer is, “You were Born.” Everything is broken. It is why things go wrong. Death and decay—none of us are exempt!
The only thing positive that I can see that came out of this mess of sin and decay were a lot of jobs Think of all of the jobs that would not exist dentists, doctors, rust control specialists, police officers, prison guard and parole officers, ambulance drivers, veterinarians… think of that, most of you would be out of job. Ha, ha! Wait a minute…I would be too. Obviously sin changed everything In the Beginning!
But, the verses continue in v. 23. In the mean time… 2 things are happening. “We, who have the first-fruits of the Spirit, groan inwardly as we wait eagerly for our adoption, the redemption of our bodies. For in this hope we were saved. But hope that is seen is no hope at all. Who hopes for what he already has? But if we hope for what we do not yet have, we wait for it patiently.” We wait patiently because the adoption process takes time. You think the bureaucracy is rough here. Look at how long the paperwork is taking place for our resurrection bodies to be adopted into glory! Actually, did you see that word first fruits? Think of it as a first installment. Your spirit is alive in the spirit, but your body is still decaying. This life is a time of testing and learning and trusting and growing while we wait for our redemption…in the mean time.
But there is something significantly more intense going on. Look at the second thing happening in the spiritual realm while we wait patiently in the mean time…“In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groans that words cannot express. And he who searches our hearts knows the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for the saints in accordance with God's will.” Romans 8: 26-27.
Did you hear that? Not only are we waiting patiently in our weakness for our bodies to be reinstated to its original glory there is a deep intimacy going on that few of us dare to pursue or even acknowledge. The Holy Spirit himself is praying for us with inexpressible words. With groans. With empathetic power. With spiritual protection beyond your deepest imagination.
Do you know what is happening in your pain? You are being prayed for by the very Spirit who gave you life. When Jesus left earth, he left to sit at the right hand of the Father in heaven—which is a Jewish phrase to sit in the seat of power (that’s why the disciples fought over who would sit at the right seat of Jesus). So what is he doing in the seat of power on the throne? He is praying for you! Father bring her peace! Father fill him! Father redeem this! Redeem that! Redeem them!
Let me try to explain it this way. When my daughter was 4, she was running through the hall to her bedroom. She felt a poke, and stopped to look at what happened but she couldn’t figure it out. For the next two days she felt pain, but nothing was showing. Just a small red dot. After two days, we took her to the doctor. As they x-rayed it, they found a sewing needle stuck in her foot nice and snug parallel to her bones (which is crazy because neither of us sew…so I started checking Christine’s arms for needle marks in case she was a druggy on the side).
They needed to surgically remove it. To numb it, they needed to put a needle between the toes. I had never seen my daughter’s eyes so scared and vulnerable. She was so helpless. So terrified. She screamed as the needle went in, “Why did this happen to me?” Then pointing to the doctor she said, “I don’t like him.” It was awful as a parent. Do you think for a moment that I lost concentration on being there for her? I just prayed with groans. I was intimately present with her. I just kept saying, “just take a deep breath. I’m here. It’s going to be all right!”
The Spirit is groaning words unspeakable over you! And now imagine this, you may have heard us talk about how the spirit and breath are inseparable in the scripture. When Adam was created, how did God bring him to life? He breathed on him! When the Holy Spirit came into the church in Acts, how did he come? The wind/breath of heaven! In fact, an amazing verse in “Jesus said, “Peace be with you…he then breathed on them and said to them, "Receive the Holy Spirit. John 20:22. Imagine that, the first time he sees the disciples after the resurrection and comes up and breathes on them. In a crisis, in times of tragedy, just breathe deep! The Spirit is holding me. Praying for me…He is Groaning with me! With every breath you take, you are receiving a filling of hope and power and oneness with the God who gave you life. So in the mean time, while we still suffer with pain and tragedy and brokenness, God is saying… “Just take a deep breath. I’m here. It’s going to be all right!”
Do you see what God is doing? He is not the author of the pain, he didn’t say, today I am going to shove lots of liquor in that man and have him drive down the road drunk and kill an innocent driver coming in the other direction. God doesn’t plan evil. God allows for us to have free choice. Because of that, we now have a sin infected world in which we are frustrated. But in the mean time we have a Savior who rescues us in our pain and groans deeply in prayer over us.
And now here is the good news! Dot #3. In the End! You see, right now, God has Satan at “check” as in when you play chess. When someone says “check,” the game isn’t officially over, but it is now just 2 or 3 moves from checkmate where the King is captured and cannot move. In the end, that is what we will hear, “Checkmate!” But right now we are in the “check” phase, so Satan knows he has lost and is trying to take anyone he can with him to death. But in the end…“And we know that in all things God works…” Stop there. In all things God works! In tragedy, in failure, in brokenness, God works “…for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.” Romans 8:28
You see, there really isn’t an answer to make the pain go away. But, somehow in the end, in any situation, if we keep our eyes on him, he works it for good. That nurse might come to Jesus as she watches your reaction. That drunk driver might see the love of God through as you forgive him. Yes, God will use you to help others who are now going through what you went through. God will work! I had to bury a 7 year old girl a few years ago who died in a car accident. The mom was busy that day, so she asked the neighbor to take her daughter to school. The neighbor ran a stop sign on the way and got hit broadside. All 3 people in the car died. Unimaginable pain and guilt and rage filled the mom. But, I’ve got to tell you, as she and her husband worked through their very personal hell, I saw God so intensely present. Their faith not only recovered, but it far surpassed anything I ever dreamed possible. I’ll never forget their laughter about a year or so later, they were actually laughing about the thought of what their daughter was doing in heaven now with all of her unique personality traits. God even used them to minister to several people in the congregation going through a rough time. God worked! Look at Paul’s response to this…“What, then, shall we say in response to this? If God is for us, who can be against us?” Romans 8:31. God isn’t against us. God doesn’t invent pain. God redeems the pain. In other words, God really does have your life in his hands.
The pain is still there in suffering, but at least now there is a context to live in a world that is not as it was intended. You may have done some things that have brought consequences, but in all things God works for Good, so who can be against you? There are no satisfactory answers to pain, but all I can now say is that in the beginning things went terribly wrong. But in the mean time God has put a stake in the ground in the form of a cross and said, “Death stops here! I am with you always!” So that in the end we can live with confidence that God will work for good in everything!


Benediction:
I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us. The creation waits in eager expectation for the sons of God to be revealed. Romans 8: 18-19